Dr Dick
On average, a Lebanese man spends 95% of his life thinking about his penis. Being a loose cannon who doesn’t conform to statistics, I have managed to surpass the national average with flying colors. But recent socio-political related stress in this city has laid its weight on my Michael Jordan performance in bed. Having exhausted every DIY remedy invented by my ancestors to boost my bowchickawowow effect, I was left with a friend’s recommendation to visit Zein Al Ateit as a quick fix.
Enter Zein’s office; I was greeted by the wizard himself wearing a black Tuxedo, white gloves stretched up to his elbows and a big smile on his face. With my pants and undies beneath knee level, the consultation was speedy and a prescription to buy a “special cream” ensued. I left his clinic with a $59,99 deficit in my pocket, “Zeit el Ateit for Ghazel el Baneit” cream and a restored faith in getting back on the sex podium.
Back home, I waited for the zero dark time mark for everyone to hit the sack so I can start with my mission.
It’s show time! Continue reading
Forgiving Beirut 